Month: March 2022

Hello everyone. I hope you’re all well. Be careful of that virus thing – it’s still around, you know.

Do you remember in my last blog I told you Leo was bored owing to the bad weather and would probably be hatching plans?  Well, he has.

I don’t hatch anything, that’s for those bird things. I simply do. I am producing a treatise on “The Feline Self”.

Treats!  Leo is making treats? I’m confused. What has the feline self got to do with it?  We both know all about that, obviously.

Oh my giddy paw! Treatise not treats!  Why does the White Delight always think about food?

We may know about the feline self but do they?  Clearly not, because our requests are only met about 50% of the time.

That’s true. Sadly, Waitrose hasn’t delivered any mice yet.

That was always suspect…. Coming back to my treatise, there are chapters on:

Voice commands: what they mean and how to respond (immediately, of course, but with what tone of voice?)

The inner workings of the feline brain and how to avoid annoying its precious being (never, never even think about removing a cat from a chair, for example)

Tail gestures: responding to different types of flicks…..

What do you mean? Stop!

I’m in the middle of telling the White Delight about my treatise and he’s interrupting me!

Your treatise won’t be necessary.  Waitrose has listened to us.  There’s a mouse in this cupboard!

Waitrose got something wrong. We didn’t order a young, fast mouse. We wanted a fatter, slower one. It must have been a substitute. We missed it and it’s probably out in the garden, now.

Hello everyone. The weather’s bad again isn’t it.  It was good for a couple of days and all those nasty, noxious and noisy bird things started flitting about collecting bits of twig. I tried to have a snooze in the garden but it was impossible.

Someone has the grumps today. He’d be furious if he knew those “bird things”, as he calls them, were using bits of his fur to line their nests. He’s moulting and the fur he’s cast off was put out for the birds during the cleaning of our house.  Apparently, it keeps them warm at night.

I think I misheard. It sounded like something from a horror film.

Mmm. He’s right about the weather, though. It’s too damp and cold to be out and I’m getting bored.  It’s making my paws twitch.

I don’t like the sound of that. The last time he was bored, he bit my tail. He sits there and plans naughty things.

Mice alive!  I only nipped him to make sure he was exercising. Anyway, he does naughty things, notably the murder of a baby rabbit, the biting of a toe,……..

STOP!  You know very well the rabbit committed suicide as a result of an overcrowded warren and I bit the toe quite inadvertently.

Bit a toe inadvertently? Oh White Delight, when you do something, you must do it properly and with intent. When I bite, I sometimes send them to hospital.